Self Development

How to Embrace the Darkness to Hold More Light

A recent New Moon meditation brought up a deep insight into the relationship between light and darkness. These concepts may appear to be esoteric and unrelated to reinvention and growth but it’s not. 

After the meditation a thought came to me; “In order to hold more light, one must be unafraid to experience more darkness”.

Fearing the (flying) light

In my homeland of Curaçao, fireflies are a rarity, unlike all the ones I saw in Costa Rica at the age of six while on vacation with my family. Once, while playing late at the playground near the jungle the fireflies emerged. 

Triggering an overwhelming fear within me. I ran to our room and avoided the jungle’s darkness from that day on. I had no idea what the flying lights were and they scared me shitless.

During the meditation, I was led to think of fireflies in the usual way I would think about them today; as magical harmless creatures that light up the sky. Which is the opposite of how I thought about them at six years old.

To see fireflies, it needs to be dark. The darker it is, the easier it is to see them. But how does this philosophy translate into practical terms? How can we integrate this principle into our pursuit of goals and purpose? 

Easy, this philosophy urges us to recognize that setbacks, failures, and discomfort are not detours but integral components of our journey. Just as success coexists with challenges, it’s crucial to make space for both ends of the spectrum.

Success and its challenges

There’s a proverb in Dutch that translates to “Tall trees catch more wind”. Tall trees that rise above the rest are exposed to more elements, including wind. So it is with high-ranking successful people. 

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They are more susceptible to challenges, hatred, opposition, and failure. In contrast, not pursuing success and growth means staying in one’s comfort zone.

We all know that to succeed one needs to be comfortable being uncomfortable. However, most people are unaware that this is what’s holding them back. 

They’re so used to avoiding and pushing through their feelings. Especially if it means dealing with “negative emotions”. Their fear of the darkness is what holds them back from experiencing the light that they’re craving. 

At the same time, sometimes we’re afraid of the light. Like my experience with fireflies in Costa Rica. I wasn’t afraid of the darkness, just the weird flying lights. The fear of success and the fear of failure are different sides of the same coin. 

To experience more success and growth, one must be able to fully embrace the darkness. To dissolve the fear of the darkness. To become completely unafraid of the possible challenges that may come. 

“You will fear the darkness only to the extent that you yourself are not providing light.” — Marianne Williamson

Pushing through is not the answer

Pushing through or ignoring fears, however, works counterproductive. It may work for a while but eventually, it will come back and bite you in the ass. Facing fears through mindset work works. 

Understanding that fear is an emotion, that our bodies hold on to these emotions, and being able to alchemize these emotions into something positive is a next-level experience. It truly allows anyone to hold more light and be unafraid of the darkness. In essence, it allows us to expand our comfort zone.

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The easy way out

We all want the easy way out. It’s easy! Not many understand how facing our emotions, makes things so much easier. That’s because it isn’t easy on the surface. We’re not taught to do it, it’s not popular and it is uncomfortable. 

It’s the darkness that we need to walk through to get to the light. Sometimes with a lot of faith while there’s still no sight of the light at the end of the tunnel. 

Practical tools to dissolve the fear

Emotions are stored in our body like muscle memory. Even if it’s a one-time event it can stay in the body. Especially if it’s a traumatic experience. Our bodies hold on to emotions like this to protect us from experiencing uncomfortable feelings.

To release what’s in the body, Somatic healing modalities are necessary. Things like Breathwork, EFT Tapping, shaking, Yoga, and meditation work well. Somatic healing modalities are anything that bypasses the mind to go straight to the body. 

Which not only can dissolve the fears in the body but can also activate our intuition. After all, it was a meditation that brought about the philosophy on which this entire article is based.

Being unafraid of the darkness

The dance between darkness and light is woven into the very fabric of our being. Just like fireflies casting their enchanting light into the night, we have the power to discover deep insights and inner strength when we embrace the shadows within us. 

In our pursuit of bigger goals, let’s keep in mind that our ability to shine brighter is tied to our courage to journey through the darkness.

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