Relationship

How To Get Over Someone You See Every Day And Find Peace

How to get over someone you never dated and see everyday? How to get over someone you see everyday but are not in a relationship with any more? Is it possible to heal when they leave you for someone else? Are you constantly battling with such questions? That’s a toughie, we know! Getting over someone you can’t have, especially in scenarios like the workplace, college, or being neighbors, can be incredibly challenging. That is a risk we have to take when we start dating these days as most of our time is spent in these places.

The proximity and constant reminders of the person makes it difficult to move on. Dealing with heartbreak involves handling feelings of rejection, the grief of a failed relationship, the persistent presence of memories, and letting go of the one you love. In such situations, making the extra effort to forget someone you love when you have to see them everyday only adds to the difficulty of moving forward.

You have a hard time because maybe you did things together, like having lunch together in the break room, engaging in simple gestures of workplace romance, sending each other memes on social media apps while working, etc. that you are no longer doing. The constant exposure to them keeps them in your mind which doesn’t free up space for healing or a new relatioinship. You can’t just unlove someone just like that, can you? This begs the question — how to stop loving someone you see everyday?

How To Get Over Someone You See every day?

Although it may be challenging, it is possible to detach from someone you see daily. With proper support and guidance, you can learn to control your emotions and move forward, even when faced with an ex or an unrequited crush in your daily life. Let’s explore effective strategies to stop loving someone you encounter every day and facilitate your journey toward healing and growth.

Willy said, “Every time I see my ex, it hurts. Trying to move on was a joint decision but I never thought it would be this difficult. Can you get over someone if you still talk to them? I have realized it is the hardest part. I see Molly every day, I talk to her, we work together and now I am gradually even forgetting the reasons that drove us apart. I only feel the pain now. I don’t know how to get over someone you see every day. It is hard to admit that I’m in love with someone I cant have and what’s even worse is when someone moves on quickly while you’re still hung up on them.” Getting over someone you love is a super-tough assignment.

Love is a strange thing. It’s hard enough to forget your crush who rejected you, to get over a crush on a friend, or even get over a crush who already has a girlfriend. The grieving process of getting over a love you can’t have surely stings. So the answer to how to get over someone you see everyday at work might seem incomprehensible. How long does it take to get over someone you ask? Few weeks, few months, years? It depends on how effectively you follow the suggested strategies, and it is not about the will to move on but the understanding that why you need to and choosing to do it consistently.

How do you get over an ex you still have to see? It is possible to do that if you go through the following steps.

Related Reading: How To Get Over Someone You Love Deeply – 9 Steps To Follow

1. Look for options so that you don’t have to see your ex every day

How to get over someone you see every day? Your first instinct may be to pack up your things, get on the next plane, and move halfway across the country (or the world, depending on how nasty the heartbreak was) so that you no longer have to wrestle with this question. Trust us, we understand how ardous it is to forget the crush you see everyday. You feel trapped, you feel uncomfortable in a place where you had the utmost confort once. We’d like to suggest some less drastic options though. Here are a few things you can consider:

  • Consider shifting to a different department within your workplace to reduce close proximity with your ex
  • Explore work-from-home options or request a transfer to another city if feasible
  • If you encounter your ex in college, church, or activity groups, consider taking a new course, attending a different place of worship, or joining a different group
  • Leaving your job or college may not always be practical, so find alternative solutions and adapt to the situation for a better outcome
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2. Do not join discussions about your ex

When people around you get to know that you are not together anymore, they could try to draw you to a discussion on the ex harping on the fact how lucky you are that it didn’t work out and how they were not good enough for you. You will not get over your ex if you talk about them.

The likelihood of inviting quizzical looks, sympathetic sighs and straight-up questions about why it didn’t work out or reassurances that the breakup was in your best interest is higher if yours was an office romance or a college fling. Refrain from joining in discussions like this and adding your two bits. You might hate your ex right now and feel like badmouthing them but refrain from sharing your feelings with others. You will add to the everyday gossip and nothing else.

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Don’t badmouth your ex

3. Go on a holiday

Want to lose feelings for someone you see every day? A change of scene might do you a world of good. A holiday is arguably the easiest way to get over someone. And if you are in an awkward situation where you don’t know how to get over someone you see every day, a holiday could put things into perspective. Getting someone off your mind becomes easier when it is occupied with exciting new experiences.

You could come back refreshed and in a better frame of mind to tackle the situation. You will feel that life has more to offer and there is no point dreading the moments you would get to meet your ex after the breakup. Besides, a clear break between your life as a couple and now two broken-up people can make it easier to compartmentalize your feelings and not let them get in the way of your inevitable interactions with each other.

A holiday and a change of scene can also help you feel good and help you get over the crush you see every day. It may help you move closer to the acceptance that nothing may ever happen between you and your crush, and you’d be better off exploring new things.

Related Reading: 21 Signs You Should Break Up For Good

4. Stay professional

How to get over someone you see everyday at work? Professionalism can be a savior. If you tell yourself that you need to be professional and you cannot let a personal debacle affect your professional career then you have made the point to yourself. It is the key to forget the crush you see everyday.

You can’t have your eyes welling up when your ex walks into the conference hall. You cannot have a quivering voice when you have to talk to the ex about work-related things. While bottling up emotions isn’t typically a good thing, in these circumstances, it is necessary and recommended.

Let your professional self take over your personality, then you will see how well you can get over someone you see every day. How long does it take to get over an ex you see every day? Depends on how professional you can get about it. This is probably the easiest way to get over someone you interact with daily.

5. Practice mental discipline to get over someone you see every day

Are you cudgelling your brain on how to stop crushing on someone you see everyday? Does that leave you losing sleep over the question of how to get over someone you never dated and see every day? Yes, loving someone from a distance can be gut-wrenching, even more so when they’re a part of your everyday life.Since the problem presents itself regularly, you have to resort to consistent practices to cope. That is where mental discipline comes in handy. Here are some things you can try:

  • Establish boundaries to limit interactions and minimize emotional distress
  • Prioritize self-care through physical and mental well-being activities
  • Spend time with your thoughts and introspect
  • Shift your perspective by focusing on personal growth and new opportunities
  • Seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a therapist to help navigate the emotional challenges

6. Mask your emotion

“How to get over your ex when you still see them?” is a question many of us have sratched our head with. Becoming emotional after a break-up is normal. We suggest you take your time to grieve. Take support from friends and family if you need to. But once you feel better, tell yourself that you cannot let your emotions show at the surface level the moment you see your ex because then you would expose your vulnerability to them and to the people around them.

I had a friend who used to hang out in the same mutual friends’ gang as her ex and whenever she would see him she would start drinking like a fish and get all emotional. Inevitably, the next day, she’d wake up with a bad hangover and a ton of regret over making a fool of herself in front of her friends and her ex YET AGAIN.

She asked me, “How to stop loving someone you see every day?” “Getting a handle on your emotions and accepting that the reltionship ended might be a good starting point,” I suggested. She quit drinking and started sitting with a straight face at the pub right in front of her ex. Soon she was giving others advice on how to get over someone you see every day.

Related Reading: 5 Steps To Ensure Closure After A Breakup – Are You Following These?

7. Be courteous but not too nice

It is all right to be civil to an ex you meet every day at the workplace, at college, or in the neighborhood. Being courteous is fine but don’t let anyone take you for granted. Even if you’re struggling to lose feelings for someone you see every day, don’t let them walk all over you. Letting go of someone who doesn’t want you can be easy or difficult depending on how much you stress over it and if you take necessary steps to move forward.

How to stop being friends with someone you see everyday? Set emotional boundaries and make sure they’re respected. Be civil but don’t go out of your way to be nice to your ex even if you want to prove a point. So if he requests you to work on the project through the night so that you can meet the deadline and that too for old time’s sake, you will know how to say no. Stick to the small talk if there is no other way around it, but do not go out of your way. You need the space to heal.

8. Be aware that your relationship has fulfilled its purpose

Every relationship in life has a purpose. It teaches you something. Some relationships are for keeps but some fizzle out at some point in time. If you are trying to get over a crush on a friend then definitely keep this in mind. So take away the best from your relationship and understand that it has served its purpose in your life. It is imperative to know when it is time for closing the door on a relationship.

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This way you will be able to get over someone you see every day. If you are trying to get over a crush at work, then be aware that your journey was meant to be this far and no further. To detach from someone you see every day, you have to break free from the notion of a happily-ever-after. Often, the reason why we can’t let go of someone is because deep inside we still hopeThat’s the key to getting over someone you love and see every day.

Related Reading: The 9 Do’s And Don’ts Of Dating A Co-Worker

9. Find peace within yourself

You might have often come across philosophical content on social media saying “find someone that makes you happy”. But before that you need to find happiness within yourself. Your peace is in your hands. We pursue love and relationships to feel happy and content in the first place, right? You can achieve that by practicing self-love. You have to know that you are the most important thing in your life. If there is just one advice for getting over someone that you’d follow, this would be it.

Whenever your mind asks, “How to stop being friends with someone you see everyday?’, you answer by saying, “By befriending yourself!” After you have made peace with the fact that your relationship wasn’t meant to be and learned to prioritize yourself, you will see that meeting that person you are trying to get over every day won’t be as excruciatingly painful anymore. Want some ideas? Here…

  • Engage in self-care activities that prioritize your physical, mental, and emotional well-being.
  • Explore a new hobby or other things that interest you to redirect your focus and create positive experiences.
  • Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who uplift and encourage you.
  • Boost your self-esteem through positive affirmations, journaling, or seeking professional help to process emotions and build resilience.
  • Set goals and focus on personal growth to create a sense of purpose beyond the relationship with your ex-lover.
Stories about breakup and loss copy 1

10. Don’t keep thinking they are your ex

How to stop loving someone you see every day and get over them? One key piece of the puzzle is to cleanse your headspace. Don’t spend every waking minute of your life obsessing over them. When you come across them every day, do not look at them and think: “There goes my ex.” NO! Absolutely not. Learning to live without someone is like learning any new skill, it takes time and and consostent effort. Taking them off the pedestal plays a huge role in this healing and grieving process.

Think of them as just another colleague, even a friend, a member of an institution but stop thinking about them as your ex. How do you get over an ex you still have to see? Think of them as just another person and not as your ex. Train your mind to do that every day when you set your eyes on them. You will be successful in moving on.

11. Time is the best immunization

How to get over someone you never dated and see every day? Can you get over someone if you still talk to them? Yes, and yes. It may sound clichéd but time is indeed the biggest healer. Sometimes the no-contact rule can create more grief, and on the other hand, seeing the person every day and having a casual conversation could help you put things in perspective. Pretending would make things worse, while acceptance will liberate. So, be mindful of this casual approach.

How long does it take to get over someone? It’s hard to specify the exact months and days but time gives you immunity. And you will see as the days go by you could be talking to them without thinking for once that one day you had a romantic relationship with them. You would have surely moved on then. You would know you have actually forgotten the memories.

12. Find new motivation

how to get over someone you work with
Draw strength from your passions

It’s very important to find new motivation. In fact, if you are trying to get over someone you are seeing every day then use that everyday meeting as motivation to move on. This could sound a bit paradoxical but then this is possible. It can’t be that you have no contact with someone you see every day. On the contrary, use that everyday meeting as motivation.

For instance, if your ex felt that you didn’t have it in you to do that scuba diving course, look at them every day and tell yourself you can. Turn the situation in your favor completely and find your own happiness. It is like tricking your heart in the pursuit of getting over someone you can’t have, sounds twisted but fun, doesn’t it?

Related Reading: 19 Dos And Don’ts After A Breakup

13. Explore therapy modalities

Consider alternative therapy approaches to gain additional tools and insights on healing process and finding peace. Therapy can provide a safe and supportive space where you can openly discuss your emotions, gain insights into your thought patterns and behaviors, and learn effective coping strategies. Here are 5 alternative approaches you can consider:

  • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): Embrace your emotions and commit to actions aligned with your values, helping you move forward despite daily encounters with your ex
  • Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): Process and reduce the negative emotions associated with past traumas, allowing for better management of daily interactions with your ex
  • Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT): Focus on practical solutions, building on personal strengths, and reframing perspectives to navigate daily encounters and create a positive future
  • Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): Develop skills to regulate emotions, improve interpersonal interactions, and cope effectively with the emotional challenges of seeing your ex every day
  • Narrative Therapy: Reshape your narratives, find empowerment in your own story, and redefine your sense of self and identity to navigate the experience of seeing your ex every day

14. Find a support system

Finding a support system is crucial when dealing with the aftermath of a breakup and having to see the person every day. Surrounding yourself with understanding and empathetic individuals can provide much-needed emotional support and guidance during this challenging time. They can help you redirect you to look forward instead of backwards.

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They can offer a listening ear, provide emotional validation for your feelings, and offer different perspectives that may help you gain clarity and find peace. A supportive network can also serve as a source of distraction and positive influence, helping you shift your focus away from the past relationship and encouraging you to engage in activities that promote healing and personal growth.

15. Engage in physical activity

Engaging in physical activity is an effective way to move on from an ex-lover you have to see every day. Regular exercise releases endorphins, which are natural mood boosters that can help counteract feelings of sadness or frustration. Physical activity also helps reduce stress levels by providing an outlet for pent-up emotions and tension.

Whether it’s going for a run, joining a fitness class, or practicing yoga, exercise allows you to focus your energy on taking care of your body and mind. Additionally, exercise can improve your overall well-being, boost self-confidence, and enhance your sense of self-worth. It provides a positive distraction from thoughts about your ex-lover and gives you a sense of accomplishment as you work towards your fitness goals.

Key Pointers

  • Seeing your ex every day can trigger memories, emotions, and a sense of longing, making healing and letting go of love difficult
  • Holding onto unresolved feelings or clinging to past memories can lead to prolonged emotional distress, affecting your overall happiness and mental health
  • Prioritize self-care, establish personal boundaries, engage in activities that bring you joy, practice self-reflection, and create emotional space by setting healthy boundaries with your ex-lover to find peace and gradually move on from the past relationship
  • When you free yourself from the emotional baggage of the past relationship, you create space for personal growth, new connections, and the opportunity to find a healthier and more fulfilling relationship in the future

“I see my ex every day and it hurts.” This is something most people tell themselves after a breakup and keep on carrying the emotional baggage of the broken relationship. It can be gut-wrenching to try to lose feelings for someone you see everyday. It pushes you into a downward spiral of overthinking with questions like, “How to get over someone you love deeply and see everyday?”, “How to walk away from someone you love?”, “How to move on from the love of your life?” The more you think about it, the harder it gets to find answers.

It is extremely unhealthy if you are subjecting yourself to this trauma every day, especially since you are not in a position to get away from the situation. That’s fine. Take charge of the situation, follow our tips and you will be soon over with the person you meet every day and a world of exciting possibilities will open itself to you.

This article has been updated in June, 2023

FAQs

1. What does it mean when you can’t get someone off your mind?

It means that despite a breakup you are still not over your crush. It means you have not yet got your closure and you are unable to move on. But if you have the resolve to get someone off your mind you can move on without closure too.

2. How do you get over a crush you’ve had for years?

If you have had a crush for years it’s hard to get over them. Even if it’s a one-sided crush or you are trying to get over a crush on a friend it is hard. But it is possible to get over someone you love.

3. How long does it take to get over a crush?

It takes between 6 months and a year to get over a crush. It also depends on how much you want to get over your crush and move on. If you want to live in the memories then it will definitely take longer.

4. Can a crush last years?

A crush can last for years. Typically you don’t get over your high-school crush that easily. It has even happened that when you meet them after years you still feel weak in the knees.

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